Temporary Archive: Suzanne Brockmann's Message Board

When I went to free fall school, the instructors got paired up with three students. My instructor was a really enthusiastic Army staff sgt….It was a “gentlemen’s Course” in that rank and position was respected, so though we were in the learning mode, the instructors were respectful. So anyway, it was two weeks of ground school and wind tunnel training before we flew to Yuma for the real jump. This SS—very exuberant—everyday was telling me, “Sir, sky diving is better than sex.” So, time for the first jump and, in a really interesting twist..you pack you own chute in FF. So the first time you FF you are jumping a chute that you packed and you have no idea if it will work—I mean it never did before—but I digress. So up we go, looking forward to our first ever 45 second free fall. Now, the instructors can fly like freakin’ wizards—plummeting like a rock, spinning out of control, waffling like a manic..these guys are falling right next to you saying “Arch” so, my first jump goes okay and I land and my instructor runs up and says “What do you think?” I say,”I think your wife is lousy in the sack.” He looks at me with a total look of disbelief lack of understanding and I say, “Look, that free fall might have lasted longer than the sex I have but no way it was better”